"A Sleeping Mind Is A Dreamer"

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Question: How Would Most Men Do?

Situation: You and your wife are having a huge argument until she totally flips out, grabs one of your many "putters" you keep laying around the house, and whacks you across the head then chases you out of the house and down the driveway threatening to beat you to death.

What would you do?
  1. Jump into your car, lock the doors then speed away, while calling the police from mobile phone reporting "Spousal Abuse".
  2. Drive yourself to the hospital and lie about how you got that big lump on your head.
  3. Call your business manager and ask for his advice.
  4. Slowly turn out your driveway, hit a hydrant, then a tree, fake unconsciousness and let your wife appear to rescue you by bashing the back glass. She's cooled off by time police arrives, after you promise her another million dollars.

Being rich and famous really has a lot of responsibilities, doesn't it?


I broke a unpolished fingernail off while kneading pie dough. I couldn't find it. What would most women do?

  1. Drop it all into the trash and begin again.
  2. Keep kneading it until you locate that half inch nail.
  3. Roll it out and bake it and hope it doesn't find its way into that slice for a guest.
  4. When ready to serve it at the table, drop the whole thing on the kitchen floor then burst into tears. Receive hugs and sympathy from everyone who agree pumpkin pie wasn't their favorite anyway.

Being a lousy cook and a old lady really has some advantages, doesn't it? And explains why store bought pie shells are so damn important to women.

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